MEN: How To Sneeze While You’re Peeing Without Spraying Everywhere

peeing

We’ve all been there.

You’re standing at the toilet, peacefully tinkling, when you feel it about to happen; you’re gonna sneeze.

You know that when you sneeze two vital issues will immediately arise:
(1) Your eyes will close.  You can’t sneeze with your eyes open.
(2)  The muscles in your abdomen (and everywhere else) are going to involuntarily contract, jerking your body to one side or the other (or up or down, forward or back).

You have two options at this point: either
(A) try to hold off the sneeze, doing everything in your power to prevent it until you are done pissing (you very rarely can ever do that), or
(B) stop pissing.  And once you’re mid-stream, that is very difficult.

So what do you do?

How do you sneeze while you’re peeing, without spraying everywhere?

You don’t.  That shit’s fucking impossible.  Also, don’t go into my bathroom until I have a moment to clean.

Advertisements

About Nathan Allen

Part Magician. Part Comedian. Totally Dysfunctional.

Posted on February 20, 2017, in Uncategorized. Bookmark the permalink. Leave a comment.

Leave a Reply

Fill in your details below or click an icon to log in:

WordPress.com Logo

You are commenting using your WordPress.com account. Log Out / Change )

Twitter picture

You are commenting using your Twitter account. Log Out / Change )

Facebook photo

You are commenting using your Facebook account. Log Out / Change )

Google+ photo

You are commenting using your Google+ account. Log Out / Change )

Connecting to %s

%d bloggers like this: